stress

As long as you are alive you will have stress.  Some stress is good for you or else you would never get out of bed in the morning.....
If we had to we'd most likely pick not to be 'stressed'.  But sometimes that's the way God gets us off our duffs and into doing something.
My dad died in April.  He was sick for a long time, several years in fact.  At some point I became the one who was responsible for him and my mom.  Maybe it was by default because I’m here and my brothers are not.  It doesn't matter why, though.  I am glad I got to serve him that way.  It took a lot out of me though.  Around 2007 I kind of left my own life by the wayside and focused on theirs and work.  
So of course the IRS decided that 2007 would be a good year to audit me.  I’ve never been audited so it is a little nerve racking and it makes me stressed.  And since I had just stopped my own life now that I have to pick up the pieces and go forward, I can't find it.
I mean I can't find either 2006 or 2007 taxes - anywhere.  So on the 22nd when I had surgery on my head I laid in the bed and wondered what I could have done with that stuff.  I have back to 1989 and every other year.  It’s something, isn't it?
so after recovering somewhat from my surgery (still sore and hurting at times) I have been going room by room and cleaning out stuff in search of those darn records.
Stress - in this case is making me clean out my house.  
I’ve got junk here from the early 70's.  Why?  I have no idea.
Phone numbers on papers with no names.  Check book registers with no dates...
How dumb.   Cards from everyone who ever gave me one.  I love to get cards.
Old books, calendars, CD's, games that have most if not all the pieces missing.  Dog collars from pets that have long been buried.  And a plethora of additional miscellaneous items that have little or no worth to even me any more.
So stress has managed to motivate me to dig through things that I’d have rather left untouched the rest of my life.
But the other day I was standing in my living room and I thought, “I don’t own this house, this house owns me”.  And started looking around at all the junk that is not worth anything and doing nothing but collecting and generating dust.
This has been a particularly hard year losing my dad, then my 16 yr old dog, then my son and his wife lost their dog, then their unborn children at 12 weeks of pregnancy, then she lost her papa, my best friend lost her pop, my other best friend lost her mom.  My brothers are both having difficulties as well.  Had to have surgery on my head, now being audited by the IRS.  All kinds of stuff has been going on, but not all bad.
But my daughter got engaged and my son had his wedding/honeymoon trip finally after being married for a year and a day.  And my 13 yr old dog had her FIRST and only litter of pups.  I kept one of them.  So there is new life in my house (and lots of potty messes to clean up)
Anyway all of the above to say that even though there are times I wish I could crawl into a cave and pull the hole in after me, for the most part in spite of all of life’s ups and downs God has been so good to me and He has held me up, carried me, rocked me to sleep, and made all of it seem trivial.  Because I know He loves me.  And that’s all that matters. 
oh yeah, my house is now a lot less cluttered, and clean!