EVERYTHING I DO, I DO IT FOR YOU

I am no longer defined by the messages of my wounds.

I am defined by the one who ransomed me, my Beloved.

He who sings me this song:

Look into my eyes, you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart, search your soul
And when you find me there
You'll search no more

Don't tell me, it's not worth tryin' for
You can't tell me, it's not worth dyin' for
You know it's true
Everything I do, I do it for you

Look into your heart, you will find
There's nothin' there to hide
Take me as I am, take my life
I would give it all, I would sacrifice

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more
You know it's true
Everything I do, I do it for you, oh yeah

There's no love, like your love
And no other could give more love
There's nowhere, unless you're there
All the time, all the way yeah

Look into your heart baby
Oh yeah

Oh, you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more

Yeah I would fight for you
I'd cry for you
Walk through fire for you
Yeah I'd die for you

You know it's true
Everything I do, oh, I do it for you

Everything I do darling
We will see it through
We will see it through, yeah
Yeah, just look into your heart
You can't tell me you'll die for love
Oh yeah, I'll be there
I'm goin' all the way, all the way

I think when I read these words of how much I am loved, that one may feel I am over the top.

Yet I know that this love that bears my name upon the heart of even Jesus, my Lord savior, Christ the Son of God, I know that this love incomparable to any else I've ever known, is deeper and more mysterious than my heart can fathom.  I speak of my heart rather than my understanding mind, sensing feelings, etc. because there in lies the depth of who I am, and where this love endures and abides.

I know that everything He does, He does it for me.  Me individually and me one of the many that make up His beloved.  He loves so deeply that all He is and all He does is for this love, for the right to call us His, for the purpose of our union.

This verges on philosophy perhaps.  The thought is difficult to express.  But it is a knowing that I have and clearly know deeply within my being.  The place that I know Him and love Him is the place of connection and communion.  We together joined for now available only from within my heart, by and by will be a reality of togetherness.

No longer lonely yet still alone, I live with a full heart not simply in anticipation to a distant future but here and now where joined with my Love together we walk through life.

I hear his voice by way of pricks from without and a soft confirmation from within. Songs like the one above are examples of these pricks, along with visions of sunrise/sunset splendor, ocean spans, chocolate delights.  When I simply recognize the pleasures that he gives me I stop to hug that connection within humbly and gratefully delighting in his love for me.  Truths come from a multitude of places into my heart but ultimately they are all from him.  I recognize his handiwork in snippets of commercials or words someone speaks unknowingly.  It delights me to come upon these unexpectedly like little jewels given throughout the day to me.  My treasure hidden in my heart are such as these.  And this was one of them.

Everything I do, I do it for you.

Oh how my heart swoons over the thought of my beloved and his passion for knowing me and being known by me.  How at home I feel finally.  I have found this treasure and my existence is forever changed. So much so that all I want to be able to say back to him, is:  Everything I do, I do it for you.

There are things and times in life that transcend thought and time which override emotion and feelings and erase all reaction to situations.  So it is with me right now.  I have a new grandson, Gabriel James Lennon.
He was born on Dec. 28th at 8 am and his mom handed him to me only hours after his birth.
It is amazing to me that such a small new little person has so much power in the world. My heart was immediately caught and won by him. No wink or flirt or coo even necessary, just that he is.  We are made from the imagination of God and in his image.  It is fitting to be instantly in love when this miracle of giving birth occurs in our families.  What treasure is ours to have been given the capacity to create this flesh of our flesh and bone of our bone - another human being.



Tracy had an ah-ha moment the other day and shared it with me, and I share it here as well.  That just as we are created to be like our God, our actions mimic his in so many ways.  Considering the act of creation, and the preparation that went into making a suitable - no - a glorious place for humans to reside; how an expecting mother makes preparation for her new child gathering the best and most precious things for her baby to be welcomed into the world to.  Nesting is what we call it.  Jesus had some massive nesting to do prior to our arrival didn't he.  And what a wonderful nest he made for us.

I find my heart expanding lately. My daughter tells me that she gets it now...  the long hugs, tender looks...
She will always be my little girl, my baby.  She has her own baby now and she says that she understands how much those touches and looks mean.  I laugh at her because I know her heart is now - like mine - expanding.

I am thankful for such simple insights and the depth of the blessings of them.